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Keys: Cut buddies, I'm just sayingJan152009
MassMedia Throwback Post: Best Friends or Cut Buddies?
Written by Nichelle at 8:09 pm
Are you okay with your mate having friends from the opposite sex? Firstly I want to say I do not believe in a male/female friends period now let me explain why.
The definition of Friends via http://www.yourdictionary.com/friend
Friend (frend)
noun
1. a person whom one knows well and is fond of; intimate associate; close acquaintance
2. a person on the same side in a struggle; one who is not an enemy or foe; ally
3. a supporter or sympathizer a friend of labor
4. something thought of as like a friend in being helpful, reliable, etc.
5. any member of the Society of Friends; Quaker
Now as you can see being a person’s best friend means you really care about that person. In fact in if you have a best friend you may love them. You don’t want to see any harm come to them, if they needed you, you’d drop everything and be there with no question asked. A friend is a person through thick and thin they will be there for you. A friend will never stab you in the back, they will be there for your greatest moments and also when you’re feeling down. A friend will be at your kid’s birthday party, baby shower, whatever party, there in the house.
A friend comforts you in your time of need; they soothe you when you feel like everything’s going wrong. When you need to complain they give you an ear and a shoulder to lean on. They know what you like and don’t like so to make where I’m going shorter– because I can go all day writing this. A friend is somebody that you are emotionally connected to. The problem comes in when the friend that you care about so much is the opposite sex.
Of course I love my friends and will do anything for them, but there are no lines to be crossed because there female to and I’m not gay. I don’t wish I had a man like them or compare them to my spouse because there in the same boat as me. There’s no deep down feelings that I’m trying to deny or make go away. I don’t get mad when she tells me I can’t hang out with you because I’m with my man tonight. It’s like go head get em girl! It’s never a feeling that I wish I had a dude like you.
Emotions are a tricky thing, being in the wrong place at the wrong time emotionally will have you rolling over waking up next to your opposite sex friend. It could be also both of you are going through the same problems and than bam your cutting.
Now I will not mind an associate that you stop briefly to catch up with, or an old pal that you passed on the streets. But a friend that you’re with and spending time with when you could be with me is a negative. I feel like I am the only female best friend my man will need. I don’t believe a man will befriend you without one time thinking about smashing it. Now us as females at least myself I don’t think about sleeping with everybody that has a nice body. But men pretty much if you got a fat ass and cute face they want to smash.
Now this is only my opinion I feel like this will hurt your relationship because of the comparing and also the friend trying to give advice. When you’re upset you want to be comfort and once a person makes you feel better the feelings start kicking in.
Just my thought for the day, do you believe a man and woman can be best friends?
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8 Comments to “MassMedia Throwback Post: Best Friends or Cut Buddies?”
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HELL NO! I can mention one movie to prove my point & that is “My Best Friend’s Wedding.” Julia Roberts in the movie had a male best friend who was getting married to another woman (Cameron Diaz). She seemed to be so supportive up until she saw how close this man was to his fiancee. Suddenly these latent feelings came to the surface & she tried to break up the two by means necessary. She literally threw herself at this man even though he still wanted Cameron over her. You see men & women can’t be best friends without that line being crossed. Either one or both will want to get intimate with the other at some point. That’s human nature. I do have female friends of my own in which boning WAS NEVER an option, but my BEST FRIEND is a man b/c I KNOW sooner or later one of us would want something more than friendship from the other.
i agree that’s why I say no
Hmmmmmm Okay, let me say this, I been on both ends of the spectrums….
I have male friends NOT that many but those male friends have all once tried to hit! lol! some had girlfriends at the time they were trying to holla at me, but I didnt fall for that shyt we remain friends till this day even with some of my guy friends being married I haven crossed that line and they havent crossed the line with me, because I wont let that shyt happend I just refused to be a homewrecking whore!
now on another hand I have had relationships with man I dated who had female friends some of them tried to convince me that these so called female friends where just that but being the player that i was I just didnt believe that shyt, now I do believe just a little that male and females can be platonic friends because Im that girl …
I did however have a situation where one of my best friends (guy) that I went to college with go into a relationship with some girl and she notice that he had alot of female friends well old dude was cool like that and previously his girlfriends didnt mind him having female friends this one particular girl wasnt having that my friend had stop calling me and emailing me and coming to see me , and first i thought that was weird but he told me what his gf said that she wasnt comfortable with him having alot of female friends, my feelings where hurt because I would never stopped being his friend if i was dating someone or in a relationship for a long time I didnt talk to him even after him and his gf broke-up ever now and then we talk but i just felt like i was more of his best female friend then the other friends he had
I can see it your way, but I think it’s so dangerous I don’t want my guy telling his female friend my business
I do understand your point but I disagree. I have a good male friend and that’s exactly what it is. Yes I know some of the business but that stay between him & I. Its a sticky situation.
I HAVE ALOT of female friends (REAL Friends) and yes some of them HAVE BEEN friends with benefits but that element didn’t diminish our friendship BECAUSE we both made bonds on how we would engage in intimate acts and we never crossed those boundaries…
But I’m NOT an average cat or dude… I happen to LUV, Respect & greatly appreciate the company of women ESPECIALLY if their sports fans OR movie buffs as well… A great sense of humor & an appreciation of comedic talents is a great trait within female relationships I cherish as well !!!
I do UNDERSTAND your point of view because I KNOW I’m a rare breed (Been told this Too Many times by others…) but a female not being able to trust her MAN (BF, Husband, Live-in, Soulmate) around other females ESPECIALLY a close female friend is Absolutely INSANE to me – LMAO
But that’s JUST ME – LOL
Nothing dangerous about our friendship, never have been never will be. I have had a male friend and he is fine as all out doors and we have been friends for over 20 years. Never saw each other as nothing else. His xwife has cried on my shoulder, and my xhusband has call him a couple of time for him to come get his crazy azz friend (me). He’s like an uncle to my kids and a son to my mother thats how close we are.
Nichelle, when you say you dont want him tell his woman friend your business, sometime its good for him to hear a woman point of view, I know that when my friend tells me his business and I tell him what she maybe feeling he has a whole different take on how she’s feeling cause now he’s hearing it from someone (another woman not his rock head friends) he values as a true friend and can really trust, not saying he does not trust his woman. He doe’s not tell me the business like that, cause I dont want to hear that part Ewww…..I’ll be the first to tell him if you mean this woman no good then step…..but dont play with her….If a woman is play with him I’ll tell him that too…..
IF YOU LOVE SOMEONE YOU NEED OT BE ABLE TO TRUST THEM TO DO THE RIGHT THING IN ANY SITUATION. AND IF YOU ARE MARRIED YOU SHOULD LOVE THE PERSON YOU ARE WITH, ALL TOO OFTEN PEOPLE GET MARRIDEF OR THE WRONG REASONS SO CHEATING AND ADULTY IS A PROBLEM. BUT IF POEPLE INSTEAD LOOKE DINTO WHY THEY WER EGETTING MARRIED AND MADE SURE IT WAS FOR THE RIGHT REASON I DONT SE EANYTHING WRONG WITH THEM HAVING FRIENDS OF THE OPPOSIT E SEX. THE SAME SEX CAN TURN EM OUT TOO